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Jealousy in the swinger lifestyle

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Jealousy in the swinger lifestyle-What to do?

 

One of the most common questions we get asked by new  swinger couples is how do we avoid jealousy when we see each other having sex with someone else. The idea of the swinger lifestyle intrigues many couples, but they don’t know how they will cope when seeing their partner banging someone else at a swinger club or swinger party.  The temptation to experiment is there, but the doubt is there as well.

I have  seen the effects of jealousy in the swinger lifestyle on many occasions. Let me tell you that it does not discriminate…you can be a seasoned veteran or a newbie swinger couple, we’ve seen it all.  But where does jealousy come from in the swinger lifestyle, where does that moment of doubt turns into a moment of real jealousy?

By definition jealousy is:  an emotion and typically refers to the negative thoughts and feelings of insecurity, fear, and anxiety over an anticipated loss of something that the person values. Jealousy often consists of a combination of presenting emotions such as anger, resentment, inadequacy, helplessness and disgust.

What are the causes to this strong  emotion:

1. Alcohol:  This is just my personal assessment . I have seen club owners have their moments of jealousy. And I know for a fact that they are completely secure in their relationship.

 

2. Stress:

 

3. Insecurity:

 

4. Envy

 

Society tells us that we should have monogamous relationship with our lover......and most of us were raised that way. So quite naturally jealousy will arise in the beginning of your swinging journey.   Trust, openness and communication are the keys to overcoming jealousy in the swinger lifestyle.

Trust in the swinger lifestyle is developed by learning your partner better,knowing their sexual desires and fantasies. Most couples don't talk about this, simply because the fear of knowing.  Becky and Derrick don't sit at home talking about how Becky wants a gangbang.......or how Derrick wants a threesome with a female.  Only the swinger lifestyle can bring this out.

A lot of our friends have told us that the swinger lifestyle saved their relationship.  "It strengthened our relationship and took us to a level of trust that we could never think of" said one of our friends.  It can enhance your love making at home, and it can make the unbreakable bond that so many monogamous seek to have.

I always tell newbies that there is a difference in fucking and making love. Once you get past that.....you'll be ok. If you can't, then you probably should reconsider your thoughts about engaging in the Swinger lifestyle.

Jealousy will arise from time to time....I admit that there are times when we get the jealousy bug. It's mostly when we're at a club or event, and  one of us has more suitable playmates to choose from than the other..... And we pick at each other about that. How you handle your jealousy will determine how you grow in the swinger lifestyle. If you feel the slightest hint of jealousy, talk it over with your partner. And don't feel ashamed about being jealous, there is a lot more jealousy in the swinger lifestyle than people want to admit.

 

This is our first part on jealousy in the swinger lifestyle

 

 

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